let’s talk about friendship goals!

Whether it’s that ride-or-die bond, the chaotic yet lovable energy, or the deep emotional connection, some on-screen best friend duos just get it. From movies to TV shows, these friendships have made us laugh, cry, and wish we had our own iconic partner-in-crime.

Have you ever found yourself questioning where you’ll find your Rachel to sip coffee with at your local coffee shop, your Cristina to call your person, the Thelma to your Louise to take on an adventure, or a Lorelai-Sookie type of bond to share endless coffee-fueled talks with? Or maybe your Elle to encourage you through life’s biggest moments like law school?

What to look for in a friendship

These iconic duos have taught us what a true, supportive friendship means, but they forgot to add the real-life challenges of finding and maintaining such deep connections.

In the real world, friendships like Pam and Gina or Meredith and Cristina’s don’t always come easily, and life’s ups and downs can make it feel like we’re constantly searching for our person. But that doesn’t mean those friendships are out of reach.

Honesty – A true friend is someone who tells you the truth, even when it’s hard to hear. They keep it real, share their thoughts openly, and never sugarcoat things just to spare your feelings.

Support – A great friend lifts you up during tough times and celebrates with you during the good ones. Whether you’re pursuing your dreams or going through a rough patch, they’ll be there with encouragement, advice, and a listening ear.

Trust – Trust is the foundation of any strong friendship. It’s about knowing that your friend has your back, will respect your boundaries, and will keep your secrets safe without hesitation.

Loyalty – A loyal friend will stand by you no matter what. They’ll support you through thick and thin, defend you when you’re not around, and be your ride-or-die through every adventure.

Shared Values – While you don’t have to agree on everything, it’s important to have core values in common. Whether it's a love for adventure, a sense of humor, or a commitment to kindness, shared values strengthen the bond.

Mutual Respect – Respect is key in a healthy friendship. It’s about valuing each other’s opinions, feelings, and differences, while maintaining kindness and understanding.

Fun – Last but certainly not least, joy and laughter. When you can have fun together, whether it’s being silly or having deep conversations, that’s when the magic happens!

When a friendship no longer serves you

Emotional Drain – If the relationship feels one-sided, where you’re constantly giving but not receiving support, it may leave you feeling emotionally exhausted and unfulfilled.

Toxicity or Negative Influence – When a friendship brings more negativity than positivity, whether through constant criticism, manipulation, or unhealthy competition, it’s time to reassess its value in your life.

Lack of Respect or Trust – If trust is broken or respect is lost, and there’s no effort to rebuild, the foundation of the friendship crumbles, leaving you feeling unsupported and unappreciated.

As we grow and develop into the person we’re meant to be, it’s completely normal—and okay—for friendships to change. Just like it’s natural for us to evolve, it’s equally okay for our friendships to evolve, or sometimes, even come to an end. Growth means letting go of what no longer aligns with who we are becoming.

The truth is, finding a bestie who’s your ride-or-die, your partner-in-crime, your shoulder to lean on, and the one who pushes you to be your best self is one of life’s greatest gifts. It might take time, effort, and a few missteps, but when you find that kind of friendship, you’ll know it’s worth every moment. So, keep those standards high, be patient with the process, and don’t forget to nurture the amazing friendships that are already in your life.

If you’re interested in learning more about your friendship needs, join us on April 6th at Pilot Project in Logan Square for our first-ever pop-up called “What About Your Friends?” It will be an intimate, interactive event where we dive deep into understanding what we truly want and need in our friendships. Spots are limited – click the link to reserve your spot now! Pop-Up Therapy Workshop Registration Form - Google Forms Let’s get close and personal about how to attract the right people into our lives and build the supportive, fulfilling connections we all deserve.